July 25th, 2004

amused, smiling

Language Lager

Mark Liberman discusses suggestions for getting more people to learn the IPA (no, not IPA, nor any of the rest of these). One suggestion he's received includes:
Brewers are persuaded that their IPA needs to be labelled with IPA. The fashion spreads to other categories of adult beverage. Congress passes a law making it a felony to teach the IPA to anyone under the age of 21, with the result that every 17-year-old in the country becomes an expert within a year.
And I think we're honor-bound to help out.
In the spirit of earlier discussion of winetalk, I propose a series of morpho-phonetic beers:

Language Lager (in honor of Mark Liberman's group blog languagelog)
IPA IPA ("Specific, yet complex. An experienced drinker's ale, will make your tongue curl.")
Agglutinative Ale ("clean, nicely varied taste, with a separable finish")
Portmanteau Porter ("So rich, almost like it could carry your luggage")
Polysynthetic Pilsner ("Bet you can't have just one!" only sold in 6-packs)
Bound Root Bock ("You just can't put it down! Perfect with your favorite morphosyntactic sugar.")

Write your congressman, or we'll never get phonetic description declared a controlled substance.